Q&A With a Counsellor

Finding someone to talk to when you’re feeling low can be daunting, however counsellors like Rhiannon Spicer, 50 from Sittingbourne, are helping individuals to take a step in the right direction. It can be hard knowing whether counselling is for you or not, so we asked Rhiannon to go into detail about her work line.

So, what is your definition of counselling?

A safe place to speak about anything you want to your counsellor and it’s all about the relationship. If you trust your counsellor and are able to be as honest as you can, you can talk through things and work out what’s best for you.

How do you put that definition into what you do in your work?

It’s like active listening, and it’s not about me as a counsellor at all, it’s about the client and what the client’s going through. So, I feel if I show empathy and I am genuine and show unconditional positive regard, the client will feel safe enough to be able to open up and understand what’s going on for them.

What got you into counselling in the first place?

I had counselling for 6 weeks many years ago and to have someone who really listens to what you’re saying and doesn’t give you advice - what I found very powerful was someone to just listen and understand.

How would a typical session in your business go?

So, a typical session, someone would come and see me, and we’d talk about how their weeks gone and what they’re struggling with and I’d go into more depth with them and stay with their feelings.

You talked about the struggles people share with you, is its hard listening to those kinds of issues? Do you get a chance to offload?

Yeah, it’s very difficult to listen to some people’s struggles because it’s a life I certainly don’t know about, what people are struggling with. It does stay with you, so to be able to offload we have to have, ethically, supervision at least once a month which is where we can discuss things that stay with us and offload.

There can sometimes be a stigma around counselling, whether it works or whether it would be right for them - what would your advice be for someone who’s contemplating counselling?

My advice would just be try it. It’s just like if you had a broken arm, you’d go to a doctor or if you got a sprain, you’re struggling walking, somethings not quite right - you go to a doctor. It’s the same for your mental health. You’re struggling mentally, you’re crying a lot and you don’t understand why? Go and see a councillor and they’ll enable you to maybe understand why you’re feeling why you’re feeling. Once it makes sense, you’ll feel so much better.

Rhiannon offers her own counselling services through her business and encourages others to look into getting help on websites such as Mind. (rjscounselling.com)